Lucy, the Daughter of the Devil is a CGI cartoon centered around the Biblically incorrect interpretation of canon figures. As a truncated calembour to the son of the Devil, Lucy is a 21 year old living in San Francisco. She is routinely ensnared by her officious father into schemes to take over the world and fulfill her destiny as the Antichrist.
As fate would have it, Lucy meets the laid back party spinning DJ-Jesus and sparks fly. At first Da-Da, the complacent exegetic Devil, isn’t fond of the couple, and plans to immediately kill the DJ. Satan soon realizes the pair aren’t exactly a match made in heaven and decides to use other methods to ward off the Jesus; although killing him isn’t entirely out of the question, as long as it doesn’t require too much of his time.
Amid this entire mess, a group of Special assasin Fathers (and a special Sister) are on a quest from the Vatican to find and destroy the Antichrist. The characters all inevitably cross paths many times in this hilarious comedy directed by Loren Bouchard. The show features many of the same cast and crew of Bouchard’s previous show Home Movies, including Melissa Bardin Galsky, H. Jon Benjamin, Eugene Mirman, and Sam Seder. The show airs weeknights (save Monday) at 12 midnight on the Cartoon Network as part of the Adult Swim.
Let me preface this review by saying that anyone who found either of Burton’s Batman adaptations better than Nolan’s “Batman Begins” doesn’t meet the minimum brain cell requirement for this Blog; kindly finish your Spaghetti-O’s and log out.
Oh, and if you enjoyed any of Schumacher’s monstrosities, fear not, there may be help on the horizon.
Blah, Blah, Blah, lets get to the good stuff. Everyone wants to know what’s going on with the latest Heath Ledger hype. Is his performance Oscar worthy or is everyone blowing it up because he passed away earlier this year? The short answer (and only answer) to this question is YES!
Yes some people are Heathcliff obsessed because this brilliant young actor has unfortunately passed on. However, before doing so, Ledger succeeded with ferocious veracity in transforming an already iconic comic book villain into the most terrifying yet intriguing villain of ALL TIME; without a doubt Oscar worthy.
To prepare for the role, Ledger locked himself in a hotel room for six weeks formulating the character’s voice, posture, and psychology. He recorded the Joker’s thoughts and feelings in a diary to help guide his performance during the filming.
I ask myself, would I like this movie as much if Heath Ledger wasn’t in it? The answer is a resounding “NO”. He brought too much to the table. Ledger reshaped not only the persona of the Joker, but raised the bar, perhaps too high for anyone within the superhero genera to ever reach again. I’m the first to admit that to even find an equivalent role where someone could hope to touch the quality of Ledger’s work would be difficult, but styles and formats change, so we’ll all have to just wait to see what the future brings.
WARNING, Spoilers ahead: Bruce Wayne is Batman!
JESUS ACTION FIGURE- one hell of a toy!
13 Jul
Gear for the Entertainer/Games & Toys, Entertainer/Novelty
The most powerful action hero in the past 2 millennia! The Jesus Action Hero from Accoutrements has posable arms, magical healing capabilities, and shoots lasers from his eyes…well not really, but if we say it long enough people will believe it.
If your faith is really strong, you’ll want to splurge the extra 2 bucks for the Deluxe Jesus Action Hero; God that’s awesome!
With a price to die for, it’d be a miracle to keep these God forsaken things in stock. Each hard vinyl Jesus Action Figure stands 5″ (12.7 cm) tall, comes with 3 wishes, and wheels for walking on frozen water. Don’t think about whether it makes sense, just buy it because it’d be a sin not to. Remember, Jesus died so you could masturbate!
*If you do not buy the Jesus Action Figure you will burn in Hell for all of eternity. People who bought this also considered the David Koresh and Marshell Applewhite Action Figures.
Twirling Spaghetti Fork- take lazy to new heights
12 Jul
Gear for the Homemaker/Kitchen, Entertainer/Novelty
Mario and Luigi would blow their loads if they got a hold of this toy.
The Twirling Spaghetti Fork from Hog Wild is a motorized fork that twirls at 22 revolutions per minute to wind up pasta on the end of a fork. Unfortunately it doesn’t cook the pasta and put it into your mouth, so it may not be appropriate for the ultimate sloth.
A great novelty for people that love spaghetti; but believe it or not, this amazing fork works just as well with Linguine, Fettuccine, and Angle Hair pasta! Dishwasher safe metal prong end.
Requires two AAA batteries
TIC TAC TOE- what does that name mean anyway?
07 Jul
Gear for the Visionary/Games, Entertainer/Gaming
Is there any other game you can feel so stupid at when you lose?
I never understood why the standard tic tac toe wasn’t a matrix of four or five, at least that way it wouldn’t always end in a tie; of course then the game would have to be called tic tac toe te tum or something like that. Really, the only time you ever win is when you’re challenging an infant, a downy, or Keanu Reeves.
The reflective design of this tacky game features half X’s and O’s which become “whole” once they’re placed on the board. Definitely an interesting concept from designer Shahar Peleg.
* May cause irreversible damage to your pride
Benders are durable plastic coated wire characters with magnetic feet and hands. You can bend your bender into any pose that suits your mood or imagination. What a fun way to ostentatiously exhibit your hobbies!
Benders from Hog Wild make a great gift for anyone passionate about a particular pastime. Find almost any sport or hobby including: Kayaking, Surfing Snowboarding, Racing, Cycling, Painting, Fishing, Golf, Soccer, Music, and many more. There’s even bender Action Hero’s, Animals, Bugs, Monsters, and Pets.
The Rock Climbing Bender shown to the right can be purchased for $16.95. The package includes one Bender, a rope, and two 12.5″ tin rock climbing walls that quickly connect before snapping into the base.
Pleo, a one week-old dinosaur by Ugobe, is an interactive robotic marvel and the newest member of your family! He’ll listen to your commands and learn new tricks as he gets older. At first he might misunderstand, so you’ll have to spend some time training him. Sensory devices such as a color camera, sound recognition, and infrared allow Pleo to see, feel, and hear. He might beg for attention or cry when he’s hungry. He may even get scared or disobedient, so listen to the training tips and download new enhancements when you can. Not intended for children under the age of 8.
The Stainless Steel Playing Cards from Touch of Ginger are not only the most exclusive and elegant set of playing cards available, they also double as class-A weapons capable of slicing to the bone; ok, not really. Just because these beautiful laser etched English style playing cards are crafted from high grade stainless steel doesn’t mean they’re going to slit your hands open every time you deal a hand; they work the same as normal cards, they just look and feel nicer.
The highbred steel deck is the same thickness and size as a standard deck of paper cards, except that these elite cards will last forever and trick people into thinking you actually have some class and style.
Taylor 916CE- hold a Grand Symphony in your hands
23 Jun
Gear for the Entertainer/Stringed Instruments
The Taylor 916ce Grand Symphony Acoustic Electric Cutaway Guitar is so freakin sick it should come with a warning from the Attorney General. Handcrafted by God himself, everything about this guitar is superior; from the rarest high-grade Indian Rosewood, to the hand selected Sitka spruce tops and the iridescent pearl and abalone rosette inlays. If I was a dying child, my one and only make-a-wish would be to touch this guitar.
The Grand Symphony produces a deeper bass than most Taylor made guitars, but still maintains that full mid with a crisp balanced high end that you’ve come to expect from Taylor. Of course the guitar wouldn’t be complete without Taylor’s Expression System Pickup which was designed to faithfully reproduce the guitars native tone. This instrument was made for people that know their guitar.
Rapid Beverage Chiller- patience is a virtue
20 Jun
Gear for the Homemaker/Kitchen, Entertainer/Party Supplies
The Cooper Cooler Rapid Beverage Chiller from Revolutionary Cooling Systems, Inc. was the result of an engineering student running out of cold beer at a party; it’s true.
At the Cooper Union School of Engineering in NYC, Greg Loibl designed and built a device that could chill a 12 oz aluminum can from 77°F to 40°F in under 45 seconds. Wow, it’s too bad Greg didn’t run out of hot chicks at that party, I wouldn’t mind a machine to deliver them in under a minute.
The Cooper Cooler chills cans and bottles 40 times faster than a freezer. The unique devise rotates the liquid while bombarding the container with ice water, and thus, the warmth within the can or bottle is able to transfer out more quickly. Don’t worry, the carbonation won’t be exploding all over the place, and if sediment is an issue, there’s a NO SPIN option for chilling that 1945 Mouton Rothschild; if you’re stupid enough to chill it!
Chocolate Pen- it’ll make you eat your words!
18 Jun
Gear for the Homemaker/Bedroom, Entertainer/Novelty
I have an idea, let’s combine the best taste ever with the best feeling ever then sell it for under 10 bucks!
The Chocolate Pen Set from Gasworks Inc. is a pair of 1.4 ounce chocolate and strawberry body pens. Use the tasty paste to draw designs or write love notes on your lovers body. The pens are easy to write with and can even be used for decorating cakes and other baked goods.
By warming the pens in warm water, you can determine how viscous you want the chocolate to be. Never mind the application, the taste alone makes this a great product, I give the chocolate pen set two thumbs up. These make a great wedding or anniversary gift, as do the other risqué products from Gasworks Inc.
*Size: Each pen is appx 6″ tall x 1″ wide
Once again, Jumpin Banana brings us the best of Paladone products with a new twist on the Hot Potato game we used to love as children. With random shocks of electricity this ball reminds me of the collar I bought for my girlfriend.
You might think this is dangerous toy because it looks like a super grenade designed to stop the terminator, but I assure you, it will not stop the terminator; I tried and now Sarah Conner is dead.
Looking for a new drinking game? When powered on with it’s special key, the shocking ball emits random bursts of electricity while it lights up. This stimulating sphere is great for all ages and makes a perfect bath time toy for those little brats you babysit.
* Actually, the Shocking Ball is not recommended for children under the age of 14 or individuals with animatronic hands.
Personally I’m a fan of the prequal: “Yes City for Young Women”.
If you’ve seen No Country for Old Men and didn’t like it, you didn’t understand it. If you understood it but didn’t like it, you have horrible taste; either way you’re a massive loser and should immediately take your own life along with any offspring you’ve produced.
Even though you’ve never seen or heard of Javier Bardem before this, his chilling portrayal of the embodiment of fates evil hand was an unmitigated display that can only be defined by Bardem’s personification of the concept of what his character represents; easily on par with Anthony Hopkins representation of Hannibal Lector.
Tommy Lee Jones plays the Yin to Javier’s Yang; “Ed Tom” and “Anton” (pronounced almost the same throughout the movie) was not a mistake my friends.
*Warning: The Read On section contains a synopsis spoiler
You don’t need to be 18 to have fun with this centerfold.
Swedish airline pilot Fredrik Johansson got tired of trying to find a place to store his guitar on the plane and decided to take maters into his own hands. The DeVillain Guitar Company and its first product, Centerfold, is a folding electric guitar. The strings roll up as the maple neck and rosewood fingerboard folds back onto the Honduras mahogany base. It takes about 20 seconds to fold and unfold the instrument. Surprisingly the strings stay well tuned, you’ll probably have to perform a quick fine adjustment, same as any other guitar after breaking it out of the case. Catch the video demo by Maurice Spencer; I swear the background music is from Crocodile Dundee, but whatever, it’s a good demo.
How does a bakery get ahead? They make one.
Being the son of a baker, fine art student Kittiwat Unarrom decided to meld his two talents into one, with his aptly named “Body Bakery”. How long do you suppose it would take the police to arrive if you plopped down on a city sidewalk, legs folded, grasping one of these loafs with both hands while you madly masticated into it? Next time you’re in Ratchaburi, Thailand you can give it a try. You’ll also be able to check Unarrom out at work, or you could just watch the video.
*Perfect for a Halloween dinner party or the next time you visit your mother-in-law.
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